Paradox Rift Pokemon Review

All Together Now… In Area Zero

Look, I’m going to say it – Pokemon 151 was a bit disappointing. There were some nice cards, some interesting ideas but nothing that could be called a legitimately good basis for a new deck – sure, Mew ex has a place in every deck, and that Blastoise ex Special Art Rare is DA BOM, but nothing meta breaking. Now, Paradox Rift, on the other hand…

Rift! Can You Dig It?

Paradox Rift has 182 standard cards but then has another 84 full art, gold, art and special art rare, making it both smaller and bigger than the previous main set, Obsidian Flames – there’s a paradox for you right there, ladies and gentlemen. It is comprised of the Japanese sets Raging Surf, Terastal Starters, Future Flash and Ancient Roar and sees the introduction of Future and Ancient Pokemon. It has 13 ex Pokemon and 7 Tera ex Pokemon, two less exs than Obsidian Flames but one more Tera. It also has 27 holo rares, three times as many holo rares as Obsidian Flames, so you might not get the same Groundhog Day feeling as you got with opening Obsidian Flames or 151 – I mean, how many useless Scovillians does a Poke-player need?

There is also one more new development in Paradox Rift, which may be seen as a positive or a negative thing, but I think personally that this is a positive thing – no more double bangers! This does mean that you can no longer double down on your dopamine hit, but it also means that Pokemon have finally done what I have been wanting them to do for years – sort out the pull rates! What this means is that 12 hits in a booster box really means 12 hits in a booster box – that’s a 1 in 3 chance of getting an ex or better. And believe me, you will be wanting a whole load of the exs from this set.

THANX POKEMONS – YOU IS THE BEST!

Come In VMAX, Your Time Is Up…

Before I start getting you salivating about all the delicious ex cards that are in this set, I should probably deal with the sabre-toothed-cyber elephant in the room – the Ancient and Future cards. If you have played through the Scarlet and/or Violet games, you will probably know that things get a bit timey-wimey towards the end… though the Area Zero Pokemon never really got a chance to shine.

Well, lament no more, because here we get to see those chronologically-challenged Pokemon and their supporters front and centre – what a times to be alive! As I said in my preview, the Ancient Pokemon all have a kinda angry Flintstones vibe, whilst the future ones are all called Iron- something – guess this is what happens if you let AI take over kids – all style, zero creativity. Both new types have some interesting new exs, rares and uncommons and also some very interesting new supporter cards. Very interesting indeed.

So, let’s look at our Paradox Peeps – Iron Hands and Iron Valiant from the future and Roaring Moon and Sandy Shocks from the past. Iron Hands is a lightning type robot version of Hariyama and has a first attack that does 160 damage for two electric and one colourless – meh – but for one electric and three colourless does 120 damage and, if it knocks out your opponent’s active Pokemon, takes one extra prize card. Say whaaaaat? Iron Valiant is a psychic-type robot version of Galade that has a two psychic and one colourless attack that does 200 damage but an ability that puts two damage counters on one of your opponent’s Pokemon when it moves into the active spot. This could be an interesting bit of chip-chip action. On the Ancient side, Sandy Shocks does 200 damage for two fighting and a colourless, but has an ability that allows you to attach a fighting energy from your discard pile to one of your Pokemon if your opponent has four or less prize cards – it could work but… tricky. But Roaring Moon… oh blimey. It has two attacks, both costing two darkness and one colourless. The second attack does 100 damage, but if you discard a stadium it does 120 more. Nice. The first attack, however, will KO anything and do 200 damage to itself. I’m sorry, but did you say ‘anything’? There have been a lot of ‘whales’ in the game of late like Mew, Regileki, the Calyrex’s VMAX plus all those VSTARs. This card has the potential to turn those essentials into liabilities, especially considering that, with Roaring Moon being a dark type, it can use Dark Patch, and some other lovely cards that I will get to later. I’m no Mystic Meg, but I have a feeling that this may be a big thing…

Planet Tera…

Paradox Rift sees the biggest drop of Terastalised Pokemon (Teraflop Tera drop?), thanks to the inclusion of the two Tera starter sets containing Tera Mewtwo ex and Tera Skeledirge ex, and they are an interesting batch that, for the most part, are pretty good. Starting with Mewtwo and Skeledirge, Mewtwo is now an Electric type that for two Psychic energy can do 10 plus 30 for each Psychic energy – very nice for those Gardevoir ex decks and is also Dark proof (well… almost Dark proof…). But how to get the energy on it quick enough as Gardevoir can’t throw energy at it like it was going out of fashion? Well, about that… Skeledirge is now a Steel type, and does 160 damage for two fire, which is… barely adequate. It does have, however, a pretty groovy ability. For the cost of one Fire energy to the discard pile, it adds 60 to your Pokemon’s attacks for that turn. And yes, it will stack. It is a Stage Two, which is awkward, but that hasn’t stopped Dark Charizard…. CURSE YOU, DARK CHARIZARD!!!

There are five other Tera exs in this set, and they are… interesting. Toxtricity is a fighting Tera-type has a two electric energy attack that does 70 damage and mills a card, but also a two electric one colourless energy attack that does 270 and discards two energy from anywhere on your Pokemon. Electric is still good, and this makes a nice electric counter in an electric deck, plus Flaafy puts energy back on. Potential. Hoopa is also a fighting Tera-type that has a three darkness energy attack that does 200 but can’t attack in the next round, but also has a two darkness energy attack that does 50 damage for each energy attached to your opponent’s Pokemon(s). Possible, but hard to charge. Tsareena, a water Tera-type, has a two grass energy attack that does 180 damage and heals 30, but a one grass energy attack that reduces any of your opponent’s Pokemon to 30 HP. Now this is interesting, but we’ll need to look at another new card to see why this is very, very interesting. Hold that thought. Garchomp, another water Tera-type, has an attack that does 120 to one of your opponent’s Pokemon for two colourless, but you have to discard two energy. Poor. But it also has a single fighting energy attack that does 160 and attaches two fighting energy from your discard to your bench. ++ SYNERGY ALERT! ++ Yeah, we’ll get back to this too in Paradox Rift. And then there’s grass Tera-type Froslass. Oh, must I? Okay. Two water energy does 140 and 20 to the bench and it has an ability where, if it is knocked out, your opponent only takes one prize. On a coin flip. Fair point, with weakness it will KO a Roaring Moon, but… at what cost? AT WHAT COST?

Putting All Your Ex In One Basket…

There are 9 other exs too, I will try to keep it brief, but Paradox Rift is that kinda set – banger after banger after banger… Golisopod ex is probably the least impressive, but even it’s 170 damage attack for one water and two colourless has potential as, if an energy is discarded from it, it switches to the bench. Play this with Mimikyu or… something else. Cofagrigus is next, doing a mere 110 damage but dropping five damage counters anywhere you like. You also get to search for a card if it gets KO’d. Tapu Koko is a good comeback doing 30 plus 90 and paralysis for one electric and one colourless energy if your last Pokemon was KO’d. It mainly gets this spot because it has the coolest, sunniest looking Special Art Rare – at this time of year, I will take ANY sunshine.

Tier 2 are Armarouge, Altaria and Aegislash ex. Armarouge works quite nicely with the Armarouge from Scarlet and Violet as it needs fire energy but no damage, please – for two colourless it does 40 damage plus 40 for each fire attached to it. It also has an ability that reduces attacks by 80 damage if it has full HP. Kinda tanky. Altaria does 140 for one steel and one water, but has an ability that heals 20 from each of your Pokemon – kinda like Radiant Tsareena but better and worse as it STACKS. Aegislash works nicely with its baby Aegi card (later… later) and does 70 damage for each prize card you have taken for one metal energy and 220 plus 30 damage to itself for two metal energy. Could be good, but only gets really good when you’re really winning.

The top three top tier cards… well, two are up for debate, but one is undeniably decent. The first, Bombardier ex, WILL be good… once we are free from Battle VIP Pass. The second attack for three energy does 130 and puts itself and its energy back in your hand, but the first attack for one energy allows you to search your deck for three basic Pokemon and put them on your bench. You can also use this in your first turn, going first. Very useful. Maushold ex does 120 for two energy and draws two cards. Okayish, don’t hit the Maus… it will do 30 damage back to the attacking Pokemon for every Maushold and Tandemaus in play. This means that, with the Zoroark from Fusion Strike still a thing, you could be potentially doing 180 back to your opponent. DON’T HIT THE MAUS. Finally, the Cheesestring Guy – Pokemon no. 1000, Gholdengo. For one metal energy, it will do 50 damage for every energy you discard from your hand. In the right conditions, this is one-hit city all day, every day. It also has a draw engine – if it is on the bench, draw one card; if it in the active, draw two. It may look like a lunchbox snack, but there’s nothing fun-size about this.

My Gosh… It’s Full Of Cards…

By now, it should be abundantly clear that Paradox Rift is a set to be reckoned with, just on the basis of the big stuff. It should also be abundantly clear that a whole host of ex cards does not a set make. It’s all about the commons, uncommons and standard holos. And Paradox Rift has a whole lotta good stuff here.

The Beasts of Ruin get their first run of non-ex cards and they’re a bit… basic. As well as Basic. They all have a ‘grab energy from the discard pile and attach’ attack and each has a second, more expensive but ultimately weak attack – Chi Yu’s vengeance attack probably the best that can do up to 140 for two fire energy. Otherwise… Meh.

In fact, in a run of Legendary and semi-Legendary rare holo Basics including Palkia, Zekrom, Deoxys, Zacian, Yveltal, Volcanion and Latios, only one stands out – Groudon. This is thanks to its second attack for two fighting and one colourless that does 60 damage for each energy discarded from your Pokemon – not just this one and not just fighting. Pair this up with Garchomp’s first attack and free retreat and you have a pretty lethal combination from this one-prize giant slayer. Not too shabby. The not-so-legendary Basics get a better run. Morpeko has a two darkness energy attack that moves both energy to the bench and has free retreat if not energised – works nice with roaring moon. Then there is the Ancient version of Amoongus, Brute Bonnet, that does 120 for two dark and one colourless – not great – but has an ability that poisons both active Pokemon if it has an Ancient Booster Energy Capsule attached – works nice with Roaring Moon too.

The Stage One and Stage Two Pokemon fare better too. Loxix gets a dark type that does 10 damage plus 40 for each damage counter on the opponent’s Pokemon for one grass; Porgon-Z does 40 damage for every energy attached to it, starting with one colourless, but has an ability that can attach four from your discard pile on a heads (you lose one on a tails); Golisopod does 20 damage for each card on your opponent’s hand for one water energy. The two stand out cards, though, are Aegislash and Xatu. Aegislash has an attack that does 120 for one steel and one colourless, but has an ability that prevents damage from V and ex cards – it’s like Mimikyu, but with a decent attack. Xatu is a perfect pair for the new Mewtwo ex… and psychic decks in general, because it has an ability that allows you to attach a psychic energy from your hand to any benched Pokemon and draw two cards. This is the retorn of Calyrex Shadowrider… but less risky and Path proof!

In the last three main sets, we have seen some absolutely top tier uncommons and commons, and Paradox Rift is no different. Looking first at the Pokemon, there is Klawf, Iron Bundle, Scream Tail, Toedscruel, Vanilluxe and Jirachi. Klawf has a two colourless energy attack that does 30 damage, but this sky-rockets to 190 if it is affected by a condition. Remember what Brute Bonnet can do? Dumb as, but fun. Iron Bundle doesn’t have much on the way of attack but if you discard it from your bench, hey presto! Your opponent has to switch out their Active Pokemon. Scream Tail has a similar so-daft-it’s-good attack; for one psychic and a colourless energy it does 20 damage to one of your opponent’s Pokemon for every damage counter on this Pokemon. Pair this with Gardevoir ex and you get enormous sniping potential. Toedscruel and Vanilluxe both have game upsetting abilities: Toesdscruel prevents your opponent from retrieving cards from their discard pile (so long, Chien Pao; nice knowin’ ya, Gholdengo); Vanilluxe turns off attacks from Pokemon with less than 40 HP (hello Tsareena ex Tera!). The potentially biggest upsetter though has to be Jirachi, because its ability prevents damage counters from being put on benched Pokemon from the effects of Basic Pokemon (go home Sableye, you’re drunk).

There are a whole load of other Pokemon in Paradox Rift that may or may not be good, plus three more baby Pokemon, but if this feature gets any bigger it will need its own website. I should put in a quick mention for the monkeys, Simisear, Simipour and Simisage. Their attack individually are too expensive to be good, but when all three are on the bench, they only cost one of their typed energy. A bit like the Regis from Astral Radiance but… not quite.

Props To The Props

There are some interesting Supporters here, too, but one probably stands head and shoulders above the rest. Mela is like Raihan 2.0, allowing you to attach a fire energy from your discard pile and draw up to a six-card hand. Rika is kinda like Colress’ Experiment: draw four, keep two, put the other two at the bottom of your deck. Parasol Lady is like a better/worse Lillie: shuffle your hand into your deck and draw four or eight if it is your first turn. Professor Turo is a bit like Penny, but allows you to pick up any Pokemon and put it in your hand, as opposed to just a basic. Tulip is like Nyssa for Psychic as it allows you to retrieve up to four Psychic energy or Pokemon from your discard pile. The big card is Professor Sada’s Vitality: it allows you to attach up two energy from your discard pile to up to two of your Ancient Pokemon, then if you do this you can draw three cards. We’ve seen this type of thing in Melony, Welder, Elyssa’s Sparkle and the like and I see no reason for this to become as much of a staple in certain decks as those cards have.

There are only four Items in this set, but what they lack in quantity they make up for in useful-ness. As with the Supporters, there are an Ancient and Future Item, and as with the Supporters, one is better than the other. Techno Radar allows you to search your deck for two Future Pokemon if you discard a card. Not bad. Earthen Vessel allows you to search your deck for two basic energy if you discard a card. Oh. Every deck? Every deck. Snorlax Doll sees the return of the card that is a Pokemon but isn’t a Pokemon - it has 120 HP and when KO’d doesn’t give up a Prize Card, but must be placed during set up. Very annoying but fun. Another more welcome return is Counter Catcher, which allows you to switch your opponent’s active Pokemon if you are behind on cards. This is an Item that is as welcome now as it was back in Crimson Invasion – welcome back, old friend.

Big surprise: no Stadiums. Bigger surprise. ALL THE TOOLS. Pardon my histrionics, but it really is Tool Time! First, you have the Ancient and Future Booster Energy Capsules: Ancient adds 60 HP and prevents status effects like poison etc. when worn by Ancient Pokemon; Future gives +20 to damage and gives free retreat to Future Pokemon. Both are just soooooo good! Next up are Defiance Vest and Luxurious Cape. Defiance Vest, like Counter Catcher, is an old favourite that reduces damage by 40 if you are behind on prizes; Luxurious Cape increases a non-rule box Pokemon’s HP by 100 but turns that Pokemon into a two-prize Pokemon – risky, but in the right hands… Finally we have the return of Technical Machines, Tools that stay on for one turn then drop off to the discard pile but give that Pokemon an extra, and usually extra useful attack. Blindside has a three colourless energy attack that does 100 damage to any of your opponent’s Pokemon that already have damage. Meh. Turbo Energise, for one colourless energy, allows you to search your deck for two basic energy and attach them to your benched Pokemon in any way you like, Getting warmer. Evolution, also for one colourless energy, allows you to search your deck for evolutions and evolve two of your benched Pokemon from turn two. Boiling. Then there’s Devolution: for one colourless energy, put each of your opponent’s top evolutions back into their hand. In a world of Charizards and Rare Candies, this could be RED HOT.

Yeah, I’m not mentioning Cursed Duster.

And Now… The End Is Near… (Please Let The End Be Near…)

Blimey. What a set. There is sooooo much to look at here that it has taken me almost a whole month to go through it, but I think that it deserves it, because this set probably represents just how good Pokemon can be when it wants to be. A bold statement, I realise, but give me a mo to try and justify myself…

(checks and realises that all the exits have been locked)

Ah. Okay, I’d better justify myself.

Firstly, this set is not just about one mechanic or, even worse, one card, a criticism that could be levelled at the last two sets. Sure, this set does introduce two new but familiar mechanics, but they are not the only possible routes to take if you want to make a deck that kicks bottom. There are plenty of possible routes to take with your decks, a veritable Spaghetti Junction of directions… although Dragon types aren’t exactly getting the love here (hey! I never said it was perfect).

Next, Paradox Rift is both eminently affordable and absolutely entertaining – the most playable card in Obsidian Flames was Dark Charizard, so if you wanted to play this, rest assured, you’d be paying the Charizard tax; here, two of the most playable cards are available in Collection Boxes and neither of them are a Charizard, so you’re just paying for the card, not the brand. Also, this is a great time to be a collector as the Art Rares and Special Art Rares continue to be nothing short of stunning – the game of two halves on the Minum and Plusle cards, the two-frame effect of the Gimmighoul and Gholdengo cards – even the ‘do we really need another’ Garganacal Art Rare card looks great. This is a fun, exciting set to open, and before moving on I really love the two-tone effect of the Ancient and Future cards. Even the presence of Nickit and Thieval can’t get me down about this set. Also, the removal of ‘double banger’ packs may seem a little disappointing at first but means that everyone who buys a single pack gets a really good chance of pulling something nice.

Finally, because I have taken up waaaaay too much of your and my time, the synergy between cards is back in a big way. And I’m not just talking about the monkeys. The way that a lot of the cards work together in this set shows that there has been some real thought put into it for the players. The bog decks will still be there and you will see them appear in tournament after tournament after tournament, but this set and its weird match-ups between giant crabs and angry toadstools, between coffins and bird-gods, between ice-creams and ice-dancers… yeah, contrary to the reports of certain influencers… I’m having fun again.